By Teesta Bhola-Shah
When AdoptTogether liaison Holly Clark was in elementary school, a brief, ordinary scene outside a classroom door left an lasting mark on her. A visiting mother came to drop something off for her daughter Allison, and standing beside her was a little girl clinging to the woman’s leg—“holding it tightly for comfort,” Clark remembers. Something about the way the child reached for that adult told Clark she wasn’t Allison’s daughter.
“She was this very nurturing, sweet woman,” Clark said of the woman she later learned was a foster parent. Clark’s mother explained that the child was being cared for temporarily; the father was a police officer who would sometimes bring children home in the middle of the night when they had nowhere else to go. It was a small scene, but for Clark it was a revelation.
“It was the first time that I realized that there were some kids out there that didn’t have wonderful parents,” she recalled. “And I had amazing parents. And I just felt like God really put it on my heart that all kids should have parents. a wonderful and loving home.”
That moment planted a seed that grew into a sustained life’s work: volunteering with children in foster care, serving as a voice for children in court, and ultimately building her own family by adoption.
Childhood conviction to lifetime advocacy
Clark didn’t let that early impression remain a private feeling. She asked her parents if they would consider fostering; her mother was eager and even went through training, while her father was not comfortable with the idea. Clark understood then what she still believes now: if a married couple chooses adoption or fostering, both partners need to be fully on board.
She and her future husband began their intentional walk toward adoption long before starting a family. As volunteers they worked with older children in foster care at Camp To Belong (a camp founded so separated siblings could build shared memories), serving as camp counselors in Illinois and Colorado. That experience deepened Clark’s view of the importance of sibling connections and creating memory-rich experiences for children who had been moved between homes.
Clark also served as a Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA)—a role she described in practical terms during the interview: CASAs are appointed by the court to be “the voice of a child,” gathering reports from teachers, foster families, and biological family members, interviewing all parties, and offering an objective recommendation to the court about the child’s best interests. That work, she says, taught her to see each child’s situation with nuance and to speak up for what would serve the child’s long-term wellbeing.
The family they built
When she became an adult, Clark and her husband followed the calling that had been with Clark since childhood. Their first adoption came in 1999 from China. Later, inspired by Clark’s mother’s work in Guatemala—where her mother ran a nutrition program and participated in cleft palate missions—the family adopted a child from Guatemala, seeking out agencies that listed children with special needs.
Clark’s path also intersected with larger shifts in adoption practices. She described one moment when volunteers from Tennessee persuaded an orphanage in China to place children with special needs into the adoption system. A little girl with a cleft lip and palate who had been quietly peeking out at volunteers was ultimately placed and adopted—and that placement, Clark believes, “opened the door for other children with special needs to get adopted.”
Today Holly Clark and her husband have three children—now adults—whom she describes as “wonderful.” At the time of the interview she named their ages: 20, 23 and 25. Her reflections on parenting emphasize the everyday labor of love—storytelling, cultural education, and intentional language.
Language matters
Clark invested time in learning how to talk about adoption in ways that honored everyone involved. She practiced telling each child their story as she rocked them, knowing the narrative would evolve as they grew. She was careful with terminology—choosing phrases like “placed” or “found” over language that might feel stigmatizing or dismissive of birth parents.
“Sometimes people would ask, like, where are her real parents?” she said. Her answer to her children was simple: “I’m real.” She also made space to validate birth parents as real people who made difficult decisions, saying she was “so thankful to them for giving you life and for placing you somewhere where you would be found.”
Clark’s family life also included strong community threads. She joined cultural groups—such as a “Chinese sisters” group for adoptive girls—where children learned their heritage through monthly gatherings, cooking classes, and friendship. Those connections endured: Clark recently attended a wedding with members of that travel group and reflected on the ways those friendships became family over time.
Paperwork and persistence paid off
Even with a deep sense of calling, Clark was candid about the practical hurdles of international adoption. She described the paperwork as a dreaded but necessary plank in the bridge to becoming a parent. “I am not someone who enjoys a lot of paperwork,” she said. She compared it to a class in which everything must be done exactly right; unlike a class, however, the grade at the end of the term is a child.
The paperwork had its comic, frazzled moments. Clark painted a vivid image of one rainy courthouse day when her umbrella flipped inside out and she was juggling important documents and envelopes. “I thought, oh my gosh, this is crazy,” she said. Despite the stress, the reward was worth it—“instead of getting a grade, you might hope to get an A at the end of it. Instead of that, you get a wonderful child,” she said.
Contact with birth families
Holly Clark’s family has had contact with one of their children’s birth families in Guatemala. She described that relationship as positive and meaningful. Their daughter met her birth family and siblings; the birth mother expressed gratitude and a sense of relief that her child now had a support network. Clark’s family has also helped provide a safety net—supporting basic needs, education, and even accompanying the birth mother through surgery when needed.
“That kind of opened the door for other children to be adopted,” Clark reflected earlier about placing children with special needs. Here, too, she emphasized the possibility of relationships after adoption that are respectful, reciprocal, and life-affirming for everyone involved.
A life shaped by a single classroom moment
Holly Clark’s story traces a direct line from an elementary-school observation to a life built around service, advocacy, and family. She turned an early realization about the fragility of children’s lives into decades of volunteering, courtroom advocacy, international adoption, and mentorship for other adoptive families.
“I wouldn’t say I enjoyed the process at all,” she admitted of the adoption paperwork, “but I was so thankful on the end to get our children.” That gratitude remains at the heart of how she tells her story and advises others on how to begin theirs.
Advice from experience
Clark’s practical counsel to prospective adoptive parents is grounded in both ethics and optimism. She urges them to research agencies carefully to ensure they are ethical, to be mindful of privacy—especially sensitive details that might be hurtful to share publicly later—and to be creative about fundraising when finances become the limiting factor. She pointed to grassroots solutions—garage sales, community tournaments, creative use of airline points—and highlighted AdoptTogether, the nonprofit crowdfunding platform she now works with, as a resource that has helped thousands of families raise funds.
She is candid about the financial reality: adoption expenses can feel overwhelming. The average cost can be substantial, but she counsels families not to let cost extinguish a calling. “Be creative,” she said, as there are many different ways that people can raise money for adoption. And be prepared to tell the family story repeatedly, patiently, and lovingly.
